We want to get married, but why does it have to be such a big deal?
Let's get real. You love each other and you just want to get married. Why does it have to be such a big deal? Why does it have to be so serious, boring, and ceremonial? Can't you just love each other and get married without having to 'say it out loud', let everyone into your private feelings and wear weird clothes and say stuff you normally only say when you're alone? Why do we need to have a ceremony at all?
The hard truth of why you should take care to plan your ceremony:
1. The world is full of people who don't get to be with their love.
Not all love stories have happy endings or happen at all. Some people:
-didn't find love,
-found it and didn't or couldn't keep it
-lost their love through no fault of their own
-have so much baggage they can't or won't commit
You two found love, want to keep it and are willing to commit to nurture it as much as you can in the hopes that it will not be lost. Not only do you deserve to recognize that and be recognized for it, the rest of the people in your life want to celebrate that with you. These people will be the ones that will be with you as your life happens and be able to support and assist you in nurturing your marriage. If they don't, they will take a back seat because they are either on board or off the boat. You are equipping your vessel with all hands that can assist you in your journey. The hole drillers will not be invited to sail.
2. If you want your union to be respected, you must show it respect.
If you want to pull up in your car, park in the parking lot near my apartment, have a marriage licence and proper ID, I can run downstairs, ask if you both want to get married and do a 60 second ceremony and you'll be legally married. And both of you will feel like you just drove through Burger King with a coupon for free fries.
If you want to create a ceremony that shows you respect each other, that you each respect the commitment you are making to one another to nurture each other and your relationship for the rest of your days, you will each recognize the importance, weight and meaning of it. It will create a marker in your memory that you will relive for the rest of your life. It will matter because you made it matter.
Take some time and plan your wedding ceremony with a professional officiant.
You will be glad you did.
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